Jade’s Poem


[Nah.. we couldn’t!]

In my Dreams:
Long, lingering glances,
Soft, gentle touches,
Delicious, passionate kisses.

In my Reality:
Quick, furtive glances,
Fast, friendly touches,
Nonexistent kisses.

In my Life:
More loving glances,
More caring touches,
More than abundant kisses.

She still remembered that Christmas. The horrible one. The one before they got home. It had broken her heart. It had shattered all her hopes, all her dreams. It had brought reality. The cruel, heart-breaking reality; he didn’t love her anymore. Maybe he had never loved her.

Life aboard had been horrible afterwards. They spoke, occasionally. They touched, occasionally.

Then, they got home and nothing changed.

Not until that one Christmas.

“Kathryn, you’re being ridiculous.”

“Pardon me?”

“We are acting ridiculous.”

“What makes you say that?”

He looked into her eyes. She thought they shone with love, but that couldn’t be.

“Damn, Kathryn, we have been acting ridiculous ever since last Christmas. Remember? We used to be best friends. We used to be even more, at least in my dreams. Now it’s been like this for a year. We have been ignoring each other and I can’t stand it anymore. Kathryn, I love you. I always have. I don’t want to have the things we had destroyed forever. I want my dreams to come true. My biggest dream to be precise. I want you to say ‘I love you’. I want you to say ‘I do.'”

“Why now?”


“I thought you didn’t love me anymore. I gave up all hope last Christmas. I was devastated. I spent so many nights crying. And now you’re telling me it was just some kind of misunderstanding? Chakotay, I thought I had lost my love forever. I love you. I love you so much.”


“And what?”

“And what about the ‘I do.’ part?”

“Chakotay? Do you mean what I think you mean?”


* ~ * ~ *

In my Life:
More loving glances,
More caring touches,
More than abundant kisses.

Standing next to him in the kitchen, she wondered what she had done to deserve this. He had made her cut the salad. She hated cutting anything. Her fingers were always in great danger when she tried.


Kathryn pulled her hand back to inspect the damage the knife had done. As Chakotay approached her, she cradled her hand close to her body, shielding it from him.

“Kathryn, please, let me see.”

Reluctantly she showed him her hand. “Don’t worry, it’s just a small cut. I’ve had them before.”

He raised her bleeding finger to his lips and gently kissed it, cooling it with his breath.

“It’s only a scratch. It will heal.”

“I know, Kathryn.”

He continued to caress it.

She closed her eyes while Chakotay took care of the cut. What did she do to deserve this after all this time? A few years ago, she would have woken up in the morning crying each time because of that dream; the one that had been so much like what was happening right now.

Chakotay touched her cheek, “Are you sure you are okay? You looked as if you were light-years away.”

He took the knife away from her, as she almost cut herself a second time.

“Kathryn, I’ll make you a deal. You can make breakfast tomorrow, but I will finish dinner tonight.”

Reluctantly she left the kitchen, reverting back to what she usually did when Chakotay kicked her out of their kitchen, setting the table.

As she set down the last dish, he heard the music Kathryn had put on: the theme Harry and Tim Jones had composed especially for their wedding.

They had been married exactly 6 months ago, and tonight they would celebrate the anniversary with their friends and family.

“May I have this dance, my lady?”

She turned around to find Chakotay waiting for her.

“I would be delighted, sir.”

He looked strikingly handsome: all dressed up in a tuxedo with a cummerbund and bow tie that matched her dress. Swaying to the music, they never heard the door chime.

* ~ * ~ *

In my Life:
More loving glances,
More caring touches,
More than abundant kisses.

“They just look so adorable, I don’t want to interrupt them.” B’Elanna sighed as she saw her friends dance closely together.

Tom put his arms around her waist, something that was becoming increasingly difficult because of her advanced pregnancy.

“Remember our last Christmas on Voyager? If you had told me back then this is how I would spend this one, I would never have believed you.”

“I know what you mean. You know, Owen once gave me advice on how to get them together. After he had given me 30 ways, he gave up, finally understanding that we had tried almost everything.”

Slowly the house filled with people, but Kathryn and Chakotay were still oblivious to their surroundings.

B’Elanna had opened an access panel and was tweaking some relays, as Harry and Tim were tuning their instruments. They figured they might as well take over from the recording because they could end the piece, whereas the tape would play continuously.

The music came to an end and Chakotay pulled away from Kathryn. She looked so absolutely radiant that he found himself falling in love with her all over again.

They had lived together for the past year and had discovered it was nothing like they imagined it to be; it was a thousand times better.

As they noticed their audience, Kathryn dropped her head on Chakotay’s shoulder. “I can’t believe we didn’t hear them come in,” she whispered, faking her embarrassment to give them a few more moments together.

When she looked into his face again, Chakotay was smiling at her and he kissed her nose.

“Well, you did tell them to make themselves right at home. I guess they’ve taken it quite literally. All ready for our party?”

“All ready. Happy Anniversary, my Warrior.”

“Happy Anniversary, my Captain.”

Just then Tom lifted Naomi up to help her put a beautiful angel on the decorated tree, “And Merry Christmas to all!”


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